Drivel
Today has been a tough day. I was writing a post about my old dog, Willow, but couldn’t summon the energy or feeling to make it work.
Today has been a tough day. I was writing a post about my old dog, Willow, but couldn’t summon the energy or feeling to make it work.
I was going to shutdown my blog today. Spare anyone who reads this from watching me crash and burn. I’m feeling unfit for human consumption. I swore I wouldn’t let myself act like a victim ever again, but lack of sleep has left me open to emotions and thoughts I didn’t think I’d ever experience…
A writing routine I’d been doing pretty well with crashed and burned last week. For a couple weeks, I’d been hiding out in a library near work during my lunch hour to pound out or edit a few pages of my book. It wasn’t much, but enough to get me back into the story, with a clear direction of what I would work on during the weekend.
I jot notes everywhere – on scraps of paper, on the notepad on my iPhone and iPad, and in numerous other applications and software. Words are strewn everywhere and nowhere. Thoughts unfold quickly, then recoil into a ball like a pillbug that’s been touched. Is it fear that interrupts my train of thought? Fear that…
I had a dream, that I would live happily ever after with the man I loved. I had a dream, that we would love each other and take care of each other. Always. I had a dream… And I remind myself. No I yell at myself. To try and get through to the heart that…
1. Forcibly separated into two or more pieces; fractured — broken lives2. Having been violated — broken promise3. Being in a state of disarray; disordered — broken ranks 4. Spoken with gaps and errors — broken communication5. Subdued totally; humbled — broken spirit 6. Crushed by grief — broken heart 7. Not functioning; out of order — Maery…
I have started to write. And this has meant going back through old blog posts and journals, looking at the journey I’ve been on. Much of it is not too pleasant to remember. But I think it’s important to look at the story from the perspective I have now and allow the story or poetry…
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Mary, you know that you can write whatever you want and we will read it! We are here to listen. So keep it comin’!
Sorry to hear about work, that must be really difficult with what you are going through and to work with your husband too.
I am sure Murphy would do a great job with the blog!
I have a good ear! I had an emotional moment on my blog today. I find it very comforting to talk to my blog friends about happy and sad times. Life just gets to complicated sometimes. WIll keep you in my thoughts! Hang in there.
Murphy looks ready to start bloggin! He’s giving us his best horsey pose there! 😉
Sorry to hear you have to work with your hubby while going through this..I can’t imagine! Do you see each other on a regular basis at work, or are you in different buildings? That has to be really hard. Hang in there. We are all thinking of you!
Murphy looks like a very zany blogger! What a photo!!!!
I can’t imagine what a hard time it is for you. My friend once advised me during a hard time to try to do one thing that I love every day, however small it might be. Perhaps that’s a good rule for you right now.
Hang in.
My husband and I work at the same company. But he is a big shot in one building, while I am a drone that kind of goes from building to building so we don’t run into each other so much. But because he is high up there, everyone knows him and thus me. It feels icky.
KB – You are right and I’m trying to keep that in mind. Taking walks with my dog, riding, writing, and just trying to find things to be thankful for.
Mary…Hang in there. You have great worth and need all your strength to get through this. It’s good that you have your dog and horses as they will support you no matter what. You can do this.
Hi Mary,
My goodness…could it be more uncomfortable??? Working for the same company for 29 years, having met there, and on top of it all the two of you always having been lumped as a couple. No wonder you are having a difficult time focusing at work 🙁
I love KB’s suggestion about doing one thing you love every day.
I remember having a horrible heart wrenching break up when I was younger-I had one dog then, Kootenai, and when I was at my saddest I would bury myself in her fur and let myself cry my heart out. Then I’d hug her tight and say “let’s go have an adventure!”
And we would. And I *always* felt better…still sad, but not so completely empty. I hope little Java can offer you some of that solace.
In the meantime, I think Murphy was trying his best to One Up my Mariah during her Tina Turner imitation. Tell him he made me laugh out loud and that I can’t wait to hear what he blogs about 😀
Hoping you can replace a ittle of that sadness with a giggle or two at your critters each day. They really are beautiful 🙂
Big hug your way!
Sue