Help!

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves.  ~Italian Proverb

Aaaghhh!

I have until the end of July to find boarding and a home!

Aaaaghhhh!

And pack!

Aaaghhh!

And figure out what I should keep and what should go, which is really tough when you don’t know where you are going to live or even what type of housing. Do I need a riding lawn mower? Is the entertainment center too big?

Aaaaghhhh!!!!

I’ve started to search for boarding. I want to board at a place that feeds square bales; has shelters in pastures to escape from bugs; has an indoor riding arena; that will allow me to park my trailer on site; that is a small, quiet (no pony clubs) facility; and I’ll do pasture board but would like them to be able to bring in horses in bad weather; and I want them to be conscientious enough to notice a problem and care enough to fix it!

I had a thoroughbred almost starve to death because they wouldn’t let him stay in his stall to eat his hay and the herd kept chasing him off from the hay out in the paddock. Just a slight tweek in their normal routine and they wouldn’t do it. I don’t want a repeat of that sort of thing.

Newsflash! Oh, good news. Spoke to a woman and I am visiting her boarding facility tomorrow. Both she and her facility sound great!

Fingers crossed!

And I’ve started to look for housing. And moving boxes and a moving company and I might need a storage unit.

This is getting ugly…

The housing market is a mess, even for buyers. Housing is expected to depreciate for another year. It kind of sounds similar to when you buy a car and it loses value as soon as you drive it off the lot.

Then housing is supposed to stay flat for 5 to 10 years. This is what realtors, the ones you’d think would want to sell you on the idea of buying, are telling me! It’s very depressing.

So by the time I retire, the house I buy MAY start to appreciate. Do you bother to put money into and fix up a house given that situation? I guess the only way you can look at it is you buy a house because you love it, and work on it because you enjoy doing that, and if you plan to get any kind of return on it, you stay there for the long haul. My plan for having the house be an investment for retirement is not in the cards.

But renting feels like money going completely out the window and if I plan to buy when I have more time to think, it means I pay for and go through the effort of moving twice! That could cost me $3000-$6000 in moving costs!

Aaaghhhh!

I’ve made tables consisting of housing choices with pros and cons, I’ve looked at both rental property and real-estate online, and I’ve mulled this over and over in my head and there is no choice that is clearly better than the other. Actually, the way things look, buying is the wrong choice right now. But it’s probably what I will fight valiantly to do because I hate moving more than anything and the thought of doing it twice in the next year is too much for my brain to deal with.

I’m looking around me right now and it’s hitting me hard, how much I love how I’ve got things fixed up and how much I love the land I’m on. I’m okay when I stay busy with friends, but I’m not so good  alone, staring at what will soon be gone.

I hope my guru friend, Sue, doesn’t mind me sharing this, but it’s too good to keep to myself. She sent me an e-mail after I got the news of the house selling and I actually printed what she said out and carry it around with me to re-read at times like this. I’ll give you a synopsis of what she advised on my housing quest:

“it doesn’t have to be the perfectly perfect most awesome place ever– it’s a place to rest up while you get some perspective. make it yours by how you live in and out of it.  just make this your summer and spend it doing things you like, that express how you want your life to look starting now.  the magic perfect living situation will still be out there waiting when you’re really ready for it.  take the pressure off.  it’s more about how you spend your time than your physical location right?”

“home is a state of mind.  it’s anywhere you feel comfortable and safe, and can relax. ignore the cracks in the walls– or better yet, make little mexican dolls peep out of them.  as you now know– you can live in a great house and not be happy.  it works the other way too.”

I’m telling you, I have really smart friends.

But still, I’m feeling a little like belting out this old Beatle’s song, even though I realize that actually, I am more self assured and independent now than I’ve ever been. As one friend commented today, “Maery, you have your spunk back.”

But still, I need some help and I’m glad I’ve got my peeps. They’ve played a big part in putting the spunk back in gear, and I do appreciate them bein’ ’round.

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9 Comments

  1. Yes! You sold your house!! Congrats! Perhaps you can be someplace next winter where you don’t have to freeze half to death! Someplace with new memories..think of it as an adventure!! You are going to be just fine..maybe even better than fine! 🙂

  2. Maery Rose…this is good news, not bad news…that’s a plus! I hope you are getting a nice hunk of change to relocate. I truly believe that you will know (when you are out there looking) if the place is right for you. LET it happen. Actually the whole thing sounds pretty exciting. Can’t wait to hear about the search.

    I still wish you could find a little farm…by the time you pay board, it might be cheaper. On the other hand, you might like living near other people where you can be part of a neighborhood… When you find the right place you are going to be so psyched!

    I’m very happy for you.

  3. Far Side – Well, I’m looking at houses in about a 10 mile radius of where I am now so no big change there and no warmer. I tried to consider living in Minneapolis. The love the houses but the traffic and noise set my nerves on edge.

    Lori – Right now, I’m just trying to remain on automatic pilot, not overthink, and just get the pain over with. I can’t get myself to be excited about whatever housing I end up with no matter how hard I try. So I’m just focusing on activities that I enjoy and looking at the house as unemotionally as I can as a box to live in. Maybe I’ll find something that gets me excited but right now, it’s beyond my powers of imagination. Trying not to care appears to be the best route to take.

  4. Wow, i am honored bb. Don’t know how much of a “guru” i am, but glad my words help you. 🙂 I’ve get yer back hon!
    i hate moving too. once a house flooded the day before we closed and it left me living with everything in storage except my bed, the tv (on the floor) and a suitcase of clothes for 2 months! Turned out to be very liberating– What the heck did I need all that other junk for??? (Got rid of tons when i finally did unpack.) It’ll all work out hon. ~pats~

  5. Wow! Congrats on the sale! I know it is scary to be out there looking with a time limit, but like everyone else is telling you…I know you will find the “right” place. I think that I threw away or donated half of the things that I owned the last time I moved. It was easier than packing. You are lucky to have an exciting new adventure and at the perfect time of the year! Also a quick closing will give you some bargaining power.

  6. Well, your house selling is good news, I think. The craziness that now ensues … well, that’s just part and parcel, unfortunately. I will send pink, sparkling mojo down upon you while you sort all this out.

    My best advice would be to simplify as much as possible, in terms of stuff, location, etc. Not much help, I know.

  7. Yippee, sold the house! You will find the perfect place to call home. Wherever ya are makes a home, not at house. I’m with ya all the way on throwin’ money away on rent.

    Have a terrifically blessed day sweetie!!!

  8. Sue – Yeah, I know. I just have that “raised by depression-era parents” fear that I’m going to get rid of something and then it will turn out I need it and I’ll have to go buy a new one. But there are definitely things I will never need nor have time to put to use.

    Jill – Did I mention I’m coming to live with you? =D

    Roxanne – Thanks for the mojo! I actually did get a couple appointments I needed to make set and visited a place to board so it was a good day.

    Lynn – Yes, I know you’re there for me. Thanks.

    Nezzy – One phone call at a time and lots of driving around… Thanks for cheering for me.

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